Obedience

There have been many nights I’ve spent praying to my Heavenly Father, asking for forgiveness.

Agonizing under the weight of sins I’ve committed. Telling Him that I’m done turning from Him. That I want to be remade new.

Only to wake up the next day and fall back into the same ugly patterns.

I’ve looked in the mirror and hated the image staring back at me. Not because of the face looking back, but because of the dirt I know is buried within me. Begging the Lord to burn away the hatred, the jealousy, the lust, the cowardice that corrupts everything it touches.

It hurts to feel such deep conviction and still fall short of the glory of God.

Sin is constantly seeking to separate us from God. To turn us inward rather outward.

Pride says, “I deserve recognition.”

Lust says, “I deserve fulfillment and satisfaction.”

Envy says, “I deserve what they have.”

Cowardice says, “I deserve comfort.”

Following Augustine’s understanding of sin, Martin Luther described humanity as incurvatus in se, the soul curved inward upon itself. For most us, the issue isn’t that we chose to do bad things. It’s that our love becomes disorganized. Loving ourselves above God and what He calls righteousness.

Scripture tells us that we all fall short. But it never tells us to make peace with it.

Paul writes of the war within himself. He knew what was right. He delighted in the law of God, yet found another law at work in his flesh. He cried out in frustration over the very sins he hated. The Christian life is not the absence of struggle; it is refusing to surrender to it.

Too often we use “we all fall short” as permission to remain where we are. We blame the devil while excusing our own disobedience. We baptize compromise and call it grace.

Grace was never meant to make peace with sin. Grace teaches us to wage war against it. It is through grace alone that we can have an identity apart from the death of sin.

We are called to be holy because He is holy.

Not of this world. Not shaped by its desires. Not content to drift wherever our flesh pulls us. We aren’t asked to look deeper into ourselves until we find purity. We are asked to continually deny the self that keeps demanding to rule.

There is no virtue in standing with one foot in the Kingdom and one foot in rebellion. The Lord warns that He will spit the lukewarm out of His mouth. To the church in Laodicea He said, “I wish you were one or the other.”

Receive repentance. Not simply by admitting failure. But reorienting what you love. Repentance isn’t self loathing, it’s returning your heart to the Lord.

The relationship Christ calls us into is not one of occasional check-ins. The life we are called to walk is not sustained by a morning prayer followed by a day of self reliance. Branches do not survive because they once touched the vine. They bear fruit because they remain connected to it.

Nobody wants to be checklist, an afterthought. Far too often we become fascinated with our own sin.

Become fascinated with Christ.

How can we expect to bear fruit if we cut ourselves off from the Vine shortly after sunrise?

Eventually the world will win that battle of influence. Because we will curse the Lord when it is hard. And forget about Him when it is easy. Falling into the flesh when we’re bored.

We know what Christ has called us to do. We know what faithfulness requires. Yet, somewhere along the way our purpose gives way to our ego.

We no longer ask, “What glorifies God?’

And start to ask, “What do I want?”

Our hope shouldn’t be that we are able to become wise enough to conquer ourselves. It’s that Christ remains faithful where we have not.

Abide in the Lord.

Pray without ceasing.

Walk with Him throughout the day, not merely for a moment within it.

So choose.

Repent again.

Confess again.

Get up again.

Kill the sin that seeks to kill you.

And when you fail, don’t run from God in shame. Run to Him in repentance. The same Christ who calls you to die to yourself is the Christ who carried His cross for sinners like you.

Be all in.

Because the truth is. Every day we will hear competing voices. One telling you to live for yourself, protect yourself, indulge yourself, glorify yourself.

Christ speaks entirely different. Saying, “Follow me. Submit yourself to the Lord. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and he will draw near to you.”

Not because your salvation depends upon your perfection, but because He is worthy of your obedience.

“When Jesus had raised Himself up and saw no one but the woman, He said to her, “Woman, where are those accusers of yours? Has no one condemned you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said to her, “Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more.” Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.””

‭‭John‬ ‭8‬:‭10‬-‭12‬ ‭

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Additional Reading:

• Genesis 3:4-6

• Romans 6:1-14

• Romans 7:13–25

• Luke 9:23-25

• Colossians 3:5-10

• Galatians 2:20

• John 15:1–10

• 1 Peter 1:13–16

• James 4:7–10

• Acts 3:19

• Philippians 2:3–8

• Hebrews 12:1–2

• Titus 2:11–14